|Strange things happen in the mists of the Keweenaw Peninsula|
This my friends is no joke.
I am both embarrassed and ashamed to admit the treachery I have been involved with in order to promote Copper Harbor and MORC in the Bell Built Grant Contest.
I have been getting disgruntled emails from contacts and colleagues as to how it could be possible that a club in a place like Copper Harbor, could be winning something as visible as the Bell Built Grant Contest.
They have been outraged! Outraged and allegations have been slung and leveled and after so much pressure I have decided to fess up.
How could it be that a town of 88 people in the literal center of nowhere can be winning against such huge and blue blooded off road riding communities in places like OR and CO they want to know??
Well I have decided to get it out. The awful truth. To clear the blackness from my soul and scour myself so that when I die and they bury me in that great Flow Trail by the Lake that I am able to ascend clean as the new fallen snow into mountain bike heaven.
|Alien Ray catchers|
You see the special helmet above? Well this is a special communication tool to other worlds. I feel unclean just showing it to you....
With this helmet Copper Harbor is able to speak to alien gods and just about anybody else they want to speak to. Including that weird dude down on the corner that is always mumbling to himself (His name is Bob and he is a 650b rider by the way).
|Norm, alien translator|
No questions are off limits. It has made us drunk with power.
However sometimes the answers can be a bit unclear and that is where the special black magic occurs.
That generally revolves around drinking special potions, dancing, burning things (many types of things) and riding bikes late at night.
|Special bike voodoo dance to get out the Vote for the Bell Built Program.|
|Special Alien Translation dance|
People speak in tongues. You hear words like "De Za Beet" and "Ma Maki" strange alien words.
|Only the Shaman can wield the "Thunder Stick"|
|Reading the shell casings...an Augury revealed|
However in order to create world class riding, we the "Addicted" will stop at nothing.....it is a terrible cycle and I dont wish it upon anybody (unless you like ripping it up!).
Oh the humanity, how could it have come to this?????
Regardless we have used this alien information to get out the vote, to stuff the ballot box full of yes votes.
I hate to say it but all that alien technology has produced trails that have a vice grip effect on getting peoples YES votes.
It literally controls their minds!
In a show of wanton solidarity we have also allowed MORC and Brown County to use our Alien technology, so the treachery is spread wider than I would care to admit....so whatever you do, please, please forgive us!
AND GET OFF YOUR BUTT AND VOTE MIDWEST BEFORE ITS TOO LATE!!!!!
WE DONT WANT TO PISS OFF THE ALIENS NOW DO WE!!!!!!!
(Whatever it takes Bell Built ends Saturday April 13th )
JUST IN ADDITIONAL PROOF OF ALIENS IN COPPER HARBOR. Luckily my esteemed partner in photographic crime reminded me a sultry afternoon spent reading the ancient alien runes...here is the evidence of that ugly, ugly day with Aaron LaRocque and Andrew Shandro...
|Ancient pictures of the Alien ships|
|Picture of special Single track Bear, used in the making of single track, notice space lines across its body|
|LaRocque is so impacted by these images that he is trying to itch his brain...through his nose!|
|More proof of our supernatural strategy...note special device on hat similar to helmis. Special Alien music is used to summon voters to the cause...|